Just when I think everything is going wrong, that's when everything is going right.
-Paul Miller
Wednesday, June 29, 2011
Thursday, June 23, 2011
DaLi G
Ma vie est truffé d'amour extraordinaire...
My life is rife with extraordinary love.
-Dali G
My life is rife with extraordinary love.
-Dali G
Saturday, June 18, 2011
A Rambling Discourse on Happiness...
Happiness trivializes the unfathomable depths of the human soul. It breeds illusory contentment doping on split second momentary fixes of high octane pseudo-amphitimite microbs of human interactions and counter-affirmations. Slap your face if you find yourself drolled into the culling lure of happiness. You are in a paralyzing dream infected by the millions and gazillions of suffocating gnomes that blankets you and the only thing that makes you recognize who you are is that awareness, that spirit which lies in the deepest recess of your soul that can decloak the phantoms of the matrix universe. Only the spirit can see through the phantom. And the phantoms are all around us in deliberate and non-deliberate disguises lurking to infect in an instant when it sees the daylight of weakness, temptation, pride, and defected humility. Noble hearts have not a chance with a defected humility. Don't just seek the kingdom, but only seek the kingdom and be armed with a desperate sense of urgency to battle each and every breathing moment. Be all-consumed with the power of your inner being to be made perfect through the agonizing pathos that besets upon you so that you may reach the unmeasurable and unfathomable depths of the human soul.
Friday, June 10, 2011
Lucifer, you are a naughty boy...
Spiritual arrogance infects and beguiles in the most humbling disguises...
Wednesday, June 8, 2011
One day I realized...
I am married to a girl who still looks at me at times with gazing eyes as if I was a superhero capable of moving tall mountains. Sometimes I'm afraid I will disappoint her. It makes me smile when she's still shy about herself around me. I like when she puts on a dress that softly caresses her body and asks if I like it. She doesn't know how to be pretentious. She can't sew or iron. She makes me go on Sunday morning walks with her. Twenty years and three boys later, one day it dawned on me that there couldn't be a person more important to me.
Collin, the first one is a dreamer. He loves his music, his friends, and his faith. He is stoic but enjoys a good comic book. He is allergic to apples. He makes a honking noise when there is too much dust. In almost anything he finds something funny.
Justin, the middle one, is more serious. He is tall and rugged. Captain of the varsity swim team. He has that swagger about him and he looks good in anything. He's a cool cat. He will be dangerous once he finds himself and realizes what he is capable of.
Ethan, the youngest, loves cooking, bird watching, and baseball. He is passionate about everything. He came home one day complaining that girls in his school were calling him names. I comforted him by saying that's what girls do when they really really like you. Next day he came up to me and said proudly "Dad, I know this girl that really really likes me." "Great! How do you know?" I asked. He replied with a big goofy boastful smile, "Dad, she called me stupid".
As for me, I am amazed. I am amazed that despite myself, I have what I have. I find myself in awe and wonder of the ordinary. I find comfort in my irrelevancy. I still don't know what I want to be when I grow up. But it doesn't seem that important anymore. I sell toys, I write, I practice law, I like working out at five o'clock in the morning and going to the church sanctuary and listen to the soft voices of angels singing.
Collin, the first one is a dreamer. He loves his music, his friends, and his faith. He is stoic but enjoys a good comic book. He is allergic to apples. He makes a honking noise when there is too much dust. In almost anything he finds something funny.
Justin, the middle one, is more serious. He is tall and rugged. Captain of the varsity swim team. He has that swagger about him and he looks good in anything. He's a cool cat. He will be dangerous once he finds himself and realizes what he is capable of.
Ethan, the youngest, loves cooking, bird watching, and baseball. He is passionate about everything. He came home one day complaining that girls in his school were calling him names. I comforted him by saying that's what girls do when they really really like you. Next day he came up to me and said proudly "Dad, I know this girl that really really likes me." "Great! How do you know?" I asked. He replied with a big goofy boastful smile, "Dad, she called me stupid".
As for me, I am amazed. I am amazed that despite myself, I have what I have. I find myself in awe and wonder of the ordinary. I find comfort in my irrelevancy. I still don't know what I want to be when I grow up. But it doesn't seem that important anymore. I sell toys, I write, I practice law, I like working out at five o'clock in the morning and going to the church sanctuary and listen to the soft voices of angels singing.
Thursday, June 2, 2011
Prom Poem for Papa John...
Dad, can we talk?
Sure, what's up son?
Well, I wanted to talk to you about the prom weekend...
What about it?
Well, you know that it's tradition after the Prom night everybody goes down to the shores for the weekend... even Collin did it, you know.
Yeah, so?
Well, me and Christine and a bunch of people are planning on renting a house and wanted to stay there until Monday.
Excuse me? Until Monday? You mean from Friday all the way to Monday? Isn't Monday a school day?
Yeah but dad, all seniors cut school on that Monday...
Why can't you just come back on Sunday night? I think Collin came back next day on Saturday after his prom.
But dad, Collin didn't have any friends...
What do you mean Collin didn't have any friends? He had a lot of friends. He had Russell, Kevin Boyce, and what was that other boy's name?
Come on dad...
How many of you are going?
About twenty to twenty-five...
Twenty to Twenty-five? Are you kidding me? Is there going to be a chaperone?
No there won't be a chaperone, and dad, I want to be perfectly honest that there will probably be some alcohol.
"There will probably be some alcohol?"
Well, most likely.
So let me see if I got this straight. There will be twenty to twenty-five high school seniors, boys and girls, under one roof for three nights and four days, no chaperone, and there will be lots of alcohol?
No dad, there won't be "lots" of alcohol...
Well, why didn't you say so... that makes all the difference.
Dad, you gotta trust me.
I trust you but it's the situation, the circumstances, which can make the smartest people do the stupidest things.
Dad, we won't do anything stupid, I promise.
Common sense tells me that it's way way too long. I'm inclined to say no but I will think about it.
Dad, I'm about to go to college pretty soon and you know, both you and mom will have to let me go at some point...
Speaking of college, if you want to help your cause, I have a great idea. Why don't you start practicing your writing skills by writing your Papi a letter.
A letter? What kind of letter?
Instead of me asking you a million questions about what you'll be doing at the shore, write me a letter.
About what? About how much I love you? You already know that Dawg!
I want you to tell me what kind of man you think you are right now and what kind of man you want to be. Something simple, nothing fancy, just something for you to think about...
Who am I?
I don't know.
I know I am satisfied, happy, and content.
But that's my nightmare.
I am a wandering caterpillar waiting to be hardened.
I am a lost bird looking for its flock.
I am a rose in a field of daisies.
Who am I?
I don't know.
My cell is hard and keeps me locked in,
And I am just waiting until my sentence is over.
Or should it be?
The shell around my heart is cracked with the things I lack.
Appreciation, dependence, love, compassion, and desire.
The fire burns...but only for so long.
The mountain peak that I think I am on,
Just keeps getting higher and higher,
A farther clime, a never-ending climb.
I am a lab experiment gone wrong,
Ready to experience the rest of my life.
Love your neighbors as you would like to be loved,
The hole that you dig up for me, give me the hope I need,
To come out victorious and shine in peace and patience.
The kindness you shine on the poor, the helpless, the needy, the enemy,
Put the goodness on me.
Let me know my identity.
The faithfulness of my loved ones, companions and you.
Let me be a knight in your bright and shining armor.
Cleanse me in your gentleness, make me a fragile piece of work.
But most importantly, keep my composure.
The face of gambler, the heart of a lion, self controlling and protecting his ground.
Feed me with your fruits.
Sure, what's up son?
Well, I wanted to talk to you about the prom weekend...
What about it?
Well, you know that it's tradition after the Prom night everybody goes down to the shores for the weekend... even Collin did it, you know.
Yeah, so?
Well, me and Christine and a bunch of people are planning on renting a house and wanted to stay there until Monday.
Excuse me? Until Monday? You mean from Friday all the way to Monday? Isn't Monday a school day?
Yeah but dad, all seniors cut school on that Monday...
Why can't you just come back on Sunday night? I think Collin came back next day on Saturday after his prom.
But dad, Collin didn't have any friends...
What do you mean Collin didn't have any friends? He had a lot of friends. He had Russell, Kevin Boyce, and what was that other boy's name?
Come on dad...
How many of you are going?
About twenty to twenty-five...
Twenty to Twenty-five? Are you kidding me? Is there going to be a chaperone?
No there won't be a chaperone, and dad, I want to be perfectly honest that there will probably be some alcohol.
"There will probably be some alcohol?"
Well, most likely.
So let me see if I got this straight. There will be twenty to twenty-five high school seniors, boys and girls, under one roof for three nights and four days, no chaperone, and there will be lots of alcohol?
No dad, there won't be "lots" of alcohol...
Well, why didn't you say so... that makes all the difference.
Dad, you gotta trust me.
I trust you but it's the situation, the circumstances, which can make the smartest people do the stupidest things.
Dad, we won't do anything stupid, I promise.
Common sense tells me that it's way way too long. I'm inclined to say no but I will think about it.
Dad, I'm about to go to college pretty soon and you know, both you and mom will have to let me go at some point...
Speaking of college, if you want to help your cause, I have a great idea. Why don't you start practicing your writing skills by writing your Papi a letter.
A letter? What kind of letter?
Instead of me asking you a million questions about what you'll be doing at the shore, write me a letter.
About what? About how much I love you? You already know that Dawg!
I want you to tell me what kind of man you think you are right now and what kind of man you want to be. Something simple, nothing fancy, just something for you to think about...
Who am I?
I don't know.
I know I am satisfied, happy, and content.
But that's my nightmare.
I am a wandering caterpillar waiting to be hardened.
I am a lost bird looking for its flock.
I am a rose in a field of daisies.
Who am I?
I don't know.
My cell is hard and keeps me locked in,
And I am just waiting until my sentence is over.
Or should it be?
The shell around my heart is cracked with the things I lack.
Appreciation, dependence, love, compassion, and desire.
The fire burns...but only for so long.
The mountain peak that I think I am on,
Just keeps getting higher and higher,
A farther clime, a never-ending climb.
I am a lab experiment gone wrong,
Ready to experience the rest of my life.
Love your neighbors as you would like to be loved,
The hole that you dig up for me, give me the hope I need,
To come out victorious and shine in peace and patience.
The kindness you shine on the poor, the helpless, the needy, the enemy,
Put the goodness on me.
Let me know my identity.
The faithfulness of my loved ones, companions and you.
Let me be a knight in your bright and shining armor.
Cleanse me in your gentleness, make me a fragile piece of work.
But most importantly, keep my composure.
The face of gambler, the heart of a lion, self controlling and protecting his ground.
Feed me with your fruits.
The Room...
Staccatos of three inch Manolos
Sweet scented perfumes approaching
Marlboro's seductive light meanders
Curling through unsuspecting
Flirtatious whispers softly dancing
"In the room where women come and go
talking of Michelangelo".
Spirit of night malingers
Oh Johnnie B, Oh Johnnie B
Jack is a lost soul
Your contemptuous spirit
crackling ice glaciers unforgiving
Submissive to God's calling
"Is it the perfume from a dress
That makes me so digress?"
Eyes glistening through light flickers
Soft tender brushes against one's laces
Black river elixir stroking deep glances
"Arms that are braceleted and white and bare
but in the lamplight, downed with light brown hair".
Darkness swallows Bayou moon reflecting
Dream catcher's fleeting moment suspended...
"A time for you and me...
before the taking of a toast and tea".
Sweet scented perfumes approaching
Marlboro's seductive light meanders
Curling through unsuspecting
Flirtatious whispers softly dancing
"In the room where women come and go
talking of Michelangelo".
Spirit of night malingers
Oh Johnnie B, Oh Johnnie B
Jack is a lost soul
Your contemptuous spirit
crackling ice glaciers unforgiving
Submissive to God's calling
"Is it the perfume from a dress
That makes me so digress?"
Eyes glistening through light flickers
Soft tender brushes against one's laces
Black river elixir stroking deep glances
"Arms that are braceleted and white and bare
but in the lamplight, downed with light brown hair".
Darkness swallows Bayou moon reflecting
Dream catcher's fleeting moment suspended...
"A time for you and me...
before the taking of a toast and tea".
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